Motherhood is painful.
It’s a very weird feeling these days… I’m busy and there is no shortage of things to be done, but I am bored. It’s constantly supervising and never being able to leave the youngest unattended, but near-constant refereeing of the older two.
I am losing my mind.
Saturday we did a little hike around Yellow Lake. Took Bailey with us. Pretty fun, puppy did great. Kids complained a bit, but wasn’t too much. That was a good day. Except for the rug burn the littlest got on her cheek 🤦♀️😔
But today… I just felt overwhelmed. Lack of sleep has not helped. B is almost weaned fully… we are nursing like once every other day. She’s managed to sleep the the night once or twice, but there is still work to do. Fortunately for all of us, Steven picks up the slack and fills in for me when I have to just retreat to our room for a bit… I mean once he’s done with work.
The toddler is constantly getting into the school stuff. Trying to climb up and get things off the counters, getting into anything not locked down. I know it’s a phase. It is still a pain.
I want to get our of the house more and do more hiking. With three kids, though, that is a bit more daunting than it has been in previous years. B rides on my back. C and P are generally good sports, minus the bickering. It is still a significant undertaking to get everyone out there.
Vegas and Zion soon. It will be a welcome break. I look forward to sleep and not having to look after anyone else for a few days. The Alask trip I had planned with C and B will have to be rescheduled. Too much Covid still around. 🤷♀️ I’m not too upset about making the decision to postpone… it will be more fun when we do get to go.
Puppy starts up the whining at about 4 or 4am and I take her out real quick. Benny whines around 5 or 6. Its generally easier to just take them all out, feed them, and go back to bed for a bit. Sometimes that works.
Sometimes I can’t get back to sleep.
Sometimes I doze on the couch.
I need a better routine.
Thank goodness for hubby… he saves my sanity.
Lookie, my kitchen was clean one day… this didn’t last long, so yeah must document.
We might take the rest of this week off school. I love doing homeschool, but the younger kids sometimes seem just bent on making it impossible. But we press on. I’m excited to finish HBL B with the 7 yr old and start HBL C. We’ve already leveled up in math. P even requested his own homeschool math to do with me, so he got a workbook too ❤
Lately so many days are just overwhelming. I am still blessed… just feeling unfit to manage my blessings.